


Old Things, New Things

by orphan_account



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-26
Updated: 2016-07-14
Packaged: 2018-05-16 11:57:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5827690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan hates Phil Lester. He had wanted a job, but he hadn't bargained for distraction in the form of a boy with good intentions but a knack for destroying Dan's life. </p><p>In which Dan gets a job at an antique shop, and finds himself wrapped up in something entirely different.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A high school AU?? Has it come to this?? Let me know if this isn't absolute shit, because I'd love to continue.

Dan hated his job.

To be fair, Dan hated just about everything but this job was a particular thorn in his side. He’d only had it for two months. It wasn’t really a bad job... He had enjoyed it for the first month and a half. In fact, he’d loved his job at first; it was the best job he had ever had.

But that was before he showed up.

He being Phil Lester, the reckoner of Dan’s demise. The eternally optimistic and endearingly clumsy Phil Lester that plagued Dan’s thoughts twenty four hours a day, fending off the little sleep he had managed to receive before. Phil Lester. He was ruining Dan’s life.

It had all started because of Dan’s mum, he could perhaps blame her.

“Dan,” she had said one June afternoon, as Dan lay sprawled on the couch, phone in hand. “You need to get a job this week.” Dan had let his phone slip out of his hand and fall onto his chest with a dull thud.

“What? Mum, I can’t get a job I’ve got-”

“You’ve got nothing. You sit at home all day on your phone.” This wasn’t untrue, Dan hadn’t left the house since they’d moved in, except to eat out with his parents. “I know we’ve just moved, but I’m not putting up with this for the rest of the summer.” His mum reached his side quickly, much to his alarm, and snatched his phone from off of his chest.

“Go now,” she said, gesturing toward the door. “At least look for somewhere to work. Meet someone. Get some fresh air.” Dan rolled his eyes, but he knew he had no choice.

And so, he left. He’d wandered out of the house with no direction in mind. His aimless walking had somehow driven him only a block away, to the front of a small cafe called Kendall’s. I’m not gonna work in a cafe, he thought. It sounded like a lot of work, but then work was going to be hard to avoid when looking for a job. Dan groaned audibly.

Suddenly, the scent of food cooking was too much for him. He entered without thought.

“Greetings,” someone said, startling him. Dan looked around for the source of the voice, and met the eyes of a boy about his age standing behind the counter. He was smiling at Dan, an eyebrow raised expectantly. Great, interaction. Dan approached the counter cautiously.

“Hey,” he said, pretending to be preoccupied with the menu. In the silence that followed, it became quickly apparent that the restaurant was empty with the exception of himself and the boy at the counter. Dan let his gaze fall back on the boy, who was staring at him with the same expression as before.  
“Are you- Are you guys even open?” Dan struggled, panicking suddenly. The boy at the counter let out a short laugh, and straightened up.

“Why would I be waiting at the counter if we weren’t open?” He asked, smiling crookedly.

“Oh, right,” Dan mumbled. Duh. Why did he have to speak? Why couldn’t he just keep his mouth shut? Why was he so-

“I’m Chris,” the boy said suddenly. “And you’re Dan Howell.” Dan froze for a moment, staring at the boy, incredulous. How did he know his name?

“How did you-”

“This town is tiny, we all know when someone moves in,” Chris said, still smirking. “To answer some other questions you’re not asking, this is my dad’s restaurant. He went out for coffee since no one’s ever in here after 3, and our own coffee is shit.” Dan let out a breathy laugh, slightly taken aback by Chris’ abrasiveness. 

“That’s why I’m the only one here.” Chris continued. “Also, if you’re thinking about ordering something I would recommend the grilled cheese because I’m 70% certain I can’t fuck that up.” Dan laughed again. He had no idea what else to do, at any rate.

“Uh sure, grilled cheese is good,” he said, quietly. Chris grinned, and opened his mouth to speak when the bell above the cafe door suddenly chimed.

“Lou,” Chris said, apathetically, and Dan turned to see who had entered. To his surprise, a girl was already brushing past him, flashing a quick smile in Dan’s direction. She rounded the counter, reaching Chris’ side with startling speed.

“New friend, Chris?” she asked sweetly, nodding at Dan.

“Nah, we go way back-” he was interrupted by the girl’s fist making contact with his arm. Dan took a step back, stunned out of speech. What was happening, should he leave?

“I knew it, Peej sent you.” Chris rolled his eyes, as Louise relaxed her body. She continued to glare in his direction. “He needs to learn to take a joke.” The girl let out a long breath, and brushed a lock of blonde hair out of her eye.

“For your information, PJ did not send me. I came of my own accord. And you need to apologize to him.” Louise was shooting him daggers with her eyes. Dan didn’t understand how Chris didn’t recoil. This girl was frightening.

“Finnnnne,” Chris groaned. “If it means that much to him.” He rolled his eyes, but something about his tone suggested that he was more nervous than annoyed. Dan wondered why.

“It does,” Louise said, smiling again. “Come over now, no one’s in here-” she stopped abruptly, and turned to face Dan. “Well, except for your friend here. Who’s this?” Her voice was much different from a few moments ago, much softer, but Dan still got the impression that this wasn’t someone he would want to cross. And, wait a moment, Chris had said everyone knew who he was already. Was that a lie?

“Ah, this is Dan,” Chris said, before Dan could answer. “My new best mate. He’s my alternate for PJ.” Louise seemed to ignore the second bit, and smiled again at Dan.

“Well, you can bring him with us. C’mon, let’s go, get moving.” She waved her hand frantically, ushering both Chris and Dan out the door. Dan opened his mouth to protest, but words failed him. He remained silent, as he was led through the door of the cafe and onto the street outside. He wasn’t entirely sure what was happening, but he also wasn’t sure that he was capable of speech. Louise scared him, and Chris... Chris scared him. 

He felt Louise’s hand against the small of his back, as she led him to the door of the store next to Chris’ cafe. An antique store? Dan thought, as he entered. Another bell jangled, echoing about the shop. Dan’s nose was met with the distinct smell of dust, and something floral. Something... Antique, he supposed.

Dan looked up to see another boy in front of the counter of the store, appearing to have just been in conversation with an old woman who sat behind at the counter. The boy now stared at Dan, Louise, and Chris for a moment, lips parted slightly in surprise, before his brow furrowed.

“Hey, Lou,” he mumbled, straightening up and looking deliberately away from Chris. 

“Is this a new employee for me, Louise?” the old woman behind the counter queried, smiling and squinting in Dan’s direction.

“Er, no,” Louise said, scratching the back of her head with pink nails. “I mean, he could be if he wanted. Chris said your name was Dan?” She inquired. Dan had perked up at the word employee. An antique shop? How hard could it be to work at an antique shop? He wasn’t entirely sure what the job entailed, but being offered a job minimized deliberate human interaction by a significant amount. He was alright with that.

“Dan, yeah” he answered her, smiling weakly as he tried to appear confident. “I- I do need a job,” he added. Suddenly, the words started tumbling out of his mouth like they always did when he was nervous. He struggled for coherency. “Not- not that you need to, uh, hire me, I just was saying, because Louise said, y'know, that you were looking-” 

“You’re hired,” the old woman said, smiling warmly at him. Surprised, Dan bit the side of his tongue to force his mouth to stop talking, and nodded at her. That was easy. These people must be desperate if they were willing to hire him on the spot, not that he was complaining.

“Right,” he said after a moment. “Thank you.” Chris made a sudden loud, exasperated noise. He had seemed to be getting more agitated with every second that passed, bouncing on the balls of his feet, with his arms behind his back, staring at the boy at the counter who had yet to look at him. Now, he seemed to be fed up.

“Peej,” he said suddenly. “Can we talk for a second?” Without waiting for PJ to answer, he grabbed the boy by the crook of the arm and dragged him into the depths of the store. PJ looked panicked for a moment, but this expression was quickly replaced with annoyance as he disappeared into the shop.

Louise sighed.

“It gets a little chaotic in here, you sure you’re up for it?” she asked, turning to face Dan, but she was smiling. Dan smiled back, shyly. He knew what his mother would say to him. She’d say that maybe chaos was exactly what he needed, and perhaps she was right.

“I’m sure,” he said, and Louise and the old woman exchanged a smile, before they launched into a brief job description of what he was signing himself up for.

Of course, what he was signing himself up for turned out to be a lot more chaos than even his mother would advise.


	2. Chaos

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know if this is too "teenager" or if I should continue

“Dan,” Louise’s voice sang out from somewhere in the back of the shop. “Help me out?” Dan set down the vase he had been pretending to inspect for cracks, and turned to face the location of her voice.

“Yeah, just a sec,” he called out, giving the vase a parting glance. He grew quickly fond of the things that people brought in, especially when they had stories about the items. He sometimes made Louise ask their customers questions, not wanting to pry himself.

“Dan!” Louise called out again, with more urgency this time.

“M’coming,” he said, tearing his eyes away from the vase and making his way to the back of the store. He found Louise quickly, as she was surrounded by piles of books. Dan loved old books. Most of the ones they took were in good shape, but some of them were coming apart. Covers faded beyond legibility, pages yellowed from age, he loved them.

“I thought I’d organize the books by year, but I think I’ve made a mistake,” she gestured at the piles of books surrounding her, and sighed. “Also, I was bored. Help me with the books and talk to me about your Dan-problems.” 

“Alright,” Dan said, smiling and settling on the floor next to her. He and Louise had quickly grown close in the almost two months that he had worked at the antique shop. She was easily his best friend, and she knew it. He thought she liked him too, but he was never sure when it came to people and their tolerance of him.

“So what’s new,” she said, flipping open a cover of a book to inspect the date. Dan followed suit, pulling a stack of books closer to him.

“I saw Chris and PJ talking very intently outside the cafe this morning,” Dan offered, shrugging.

“Stop it, I meant what’s new with you, not with those two,” she said, shooting Dan a sharp look. “As if Chris and Peej wouldn’t be talking to each other.” She rolled her eyes.

“Nothing’s new, really,” Dan mumbled, uncomfortable now. He didn’t like talking about himself all that much. Louise knew this, but she had decided to become his personal therapist since she had caught him crying behind the cafe a few weeks after he had started working. He had told her he was crying over a video he had watched on his phone about puppy adoptions, but Louise had refused to buy that excuse and he didn’t really blame her.

“How are your parents?” she asked, in a soft voice. 

“They’re fine Lou, it’s not as though I’ve... Come out,” he added, in a whisper.

“Dan, it’s just you and me here, Mrs. Pelle’s out for coffee, you’re fine,” Louise said, reassuringly. “And besides-” she began, but she was distracted by the jangle of the shop’s door being opened.

“Peej?” she called out.

“Yeah, and Chris. Are you guys in the back?” PJ called back from the front of the shop.

“Yeah, come help us,” Louise replied. In moments, Chris and PJ had materialized before them.

“Where have you been anyways, Pj?” Louise asked, eyebrows raised. “You’re supposed to have been working since noon.” PJ scratched his jaw, awkwardly, glancing at Chris’ ever-beaming profile.

“Sorry, got distracted at the cafe,” he mumbled.

“Yeah, I’ll bet,” Louise said, almost inaudibly. Dan snorted, clapping a hand over his mouth to stop himself from laughing. Louise glared at him.

“What was that?” PJ asked, looking slightly panicked. Louise just shook her head.

“Sit down, help us,” she said, patting the ground next to her. “You too Chris, unless you plan to just stand there and smirk.”

“I never smirk,” Chris said, smirking. Dan laughed quietly to himself, brushing the dust off the cover of a new book. The four of them began to settle into a routine, PJ shelving and Louise and Dan sorting. Chris contributed with his usual inappropriate humor, that occasionally reduced Louise and Dan to wheezing laughter and tears. Dan was just thinking that today was shaping up to be pretty good, when the bell above the door jangled once more.

“That’ll be a customer, I reckon,” Dan said, rising to his feet. PJ followed suit. 

“I got it,” he said, making his way back to the front of the store. Dan sat back down, and started to pick up another book when, suddenly out of Dan’s sight, PJ gasped.

“Phil!” he heard PJ shout. Beside him, Louise abruptly clambered to her feet, her face splitting into a smile. Chris was already up, and disappearing from sight.

“Phil!” Louise shouted, practically running to the front of the shop. Dan sat for a moment, a little startled. Then, he rose to his feet. He could hear his three friends talking as he followed them to the front of the store. As he made his way toward them, he saw that Louise had someone he didn’t recognize wrapped in her embrace.

“Oof-” she exclaimed, squeezing the boy. Dan could see tufts of black hair and a red sweatshirt, but the boy’s face remained hidden. “We’ve missed you.” He heard the boy laugh, as he left her arms, before PJ and Chris pulled him in for a hug.

“Oi, I’m not hugging Chris, he doesn’t wash,” the black-haired boy said, laughingly. Dan felt odd. Something warm was settling in the bottom of his stomach. Was he jealous that his friends had another friend? He pulled the sleeves of his shirt over his hands, and shifted his weight awkwardly.

“Who’s this?” the boy said suddenly, his eyes falling upon Dan. Dan’s cheeks flushed as he took the boy in. Dan was very particular about attraction, he rarely gravitated toward anyone. In fact, as far as Dan could remember he had never gravitated toward anyone. But, upon seeing the boy’s beaming face, he felt something. A pull? The boy had spoken enough words that Dan could count on two hands, so what was this then?

Dan worried that he might be sick, or maybe he was going mad.

“Phil, this is Dan,” Louise said, and Dan realized that he had been staring too long. Oh god, he had been staring? What was wrong with him, this didn’t happen to him.

“Nice to meet you Dan, do you work here now?” Phil asked with a smile, his tongue poking out from between his teeth. They all stared at him, expectantly. Dan was expected to speak?! He could barely think.

“Uh, yas,” Dan said, his teeth clamping onto his lip immediately. Wait, what had he just said?! “I- I meant ‘yeah’ or ‘yes’ and they sort of... Combined...” His face was on fire, he was going to explode. He was sure of it now, yes, he was dying. In front of him, Louise burst into laughter. He ignored this, he probably didn’t have enough time left to make funeral arrangements but he could at least tell Louise to destroy his laptop before his parents got a hold of it.

“Yassss,” Chris imitated him, and PJ and Louise began to laugh harder. Dan’s vision, which he seemed to have forgotten was one of his senses for a moment, seemed to have returned and he could see Phil laughing with them. 

“I’m sorry, I’m terrible at... Speaking,” Dan sighed, as they all continued to laugh at him.

“It’s alright, it’s not really my strong suit either,” Phil said, still laughing. He offered Dan a small smile, and his gaze softened. 

Oh god, who was this guy and what the hell was he doing to Dan’s brain? Dan turned to Louise, trying to communicate with his eyes that he needed to leave immediately. Louise, of course, (being at least 60% psychic) picked up on his message immediately.

“Shit,” she said suddenly, and they all turned to look at her. “We forgot to pick up Mrs. Pelle’s prescription.” She grabbed Dan’s hand, leading him out of the store. “Be right back!” she called behind her to their surprised faces, as the bell jangled above them.

They didn’t speak as they made their way to Louise’ car, but once Dan was settled in the passenger seat, she began to interrogate him.

“Do you know Phil or something? He seemed to recognize you, or you him, and you were acting strange; Are you okay? Because if you’re not you need to tell me-”

“I’m fine Lou. I think I’m sick or something.” Dan mumbled, slumping back into the seat. Louise visibly relaxed, but she still looked concerned.

“Is that why you were acting so off?” she asked, gingerly resting her palm on Dan’s forehead to check his temperature. “You feel a little warm...”

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Phil, he’s, I don’t know, it’s like I reacted to him?” Dan offered, pleadingly. Louise’ face suddenly broke into a smile.

“Could you possibly be ‘attracted’ to him, Daniel Howell?” She asked, absolutely grinning now. “Or maybe it’s love at first sight?” She added, teasingly.

“Shut up, I don’t do that,” Dan mumbled, staring out the car window now. Great, he shouldn’t have shared. He knew he had completely fucked himself over.

“You’re a teenager, Dan. Yes you do,” Louise raised her eyebrows at him in the rearview mirror. “Ah well, since you don’t have any ‘feelings’, I’m sure it’s of no interest to you that he’s single and he happens to swing that way,” She sang, wiggling her eyebrows. Dan groaned.

“It’s not of interest to me, Louise,” Dan lied, turning to face her again. “I want to stay as far away from him as possible,” he said, reaching over to turn Louise’s keys in the ignition. "I think I'm allergic," he muttered to himself.

“Well, that might prove to be a challenge,” Louise said, after a moment. Dan leaned back so he could look at her better. He folded his arms across his chest.

“Why’s that?” Dan asked, already knowing the answer.

“Because he works with us.”


	3. Chapter 3

Dan had initially settled upon an optimistic stance regarding his... Phil problem. Louise had said he felt a bit hot, so he had decided to blame his odd behavior on genuine illness. His plan was going to be to avoid Phil, which had seemed plausible at 3am on the night before their first shift together. That was, until Louise called.

“Dan,” she said croakily, over the phone. Dan felt his stomach drop, and flopped his head back onto the pillow.

“I swear to god, Louise-” he started. She interrupted him with a cough that lasted the better part of fifteen seconds. Dan flipped over onto his stomach and groaned into the pillow.

“I’m sick,” she said, quietly. Dan took a long, deep breath.

“Are you okay?” He asked through gritted teeth, eyes squeezed shut.

“I’m sick,” she repeated.

“I’m going to die, Louise,” he said, running a hand through his curls. “He’s going to kill me and you’re going to be too sick to come recover my dead body.” He rose to his feet, shedding his pajamas and searching his floor for a clean pair of jeans.

“You’re not going to die, Phil’s a sweetheart,” she said, followed by a short cough.

“At least we’re dying together,” Dan mumbled, holding the phone to his ear with his shoulder as he slipped into a pair of black skinny jeans.

“Listen to me,” Louise said, her voice cracking more with volume. “You’re going to be fine. You need to calm down. Take a deep breath.” He rolled his eyes, but he still stopped for a moment to breathe.

“I know I’m overreacting,” Dan said, sinking to the floor next to his bed. “You know how I hate feelings, Lou. I’m worried I’ll have feelings.”

“What kind?” Louise asked. Dan thought for a moment while she sniffled.

“Any kind.” He sighed, closing his eyes.

“You’re ridiculous, go to work. I’ll send PJ in as soon as he wakes up,” Louise said, and Dan heard her bedsprings creak with movement.

“That means nothing to me, PJ won’t be up before 2.” Dan groaned again.

“Bye, Dan. Text me when you get there.” She hung up.

“Ugh,” Dan moaned to himself, and tossed his phone onto the bed behind him. Today was going to be terrible, even more so without Louise. He was less than excited.

Because Louise wasn’t picking him up, he decided to walk. Mostly to stall until he had to work with Phil. Dan didn’t really know what his problem was, he’d never had a problem like this before. He avoided Problems like the plague. For some reason he was especially desperate to avoid this one.

It was 6:00 now, PJ was supposed to come in at three. Mrs. Pelle was at her son’s house for the week, leaving himself and Phil in the store alone. Dan had no idea how Phil felt about anything because Louise refused to “ask super casually” for him. Not that he cared. He did not care. Of course he didn’t.

As Dan swung the door to the shop open with his hip, and spotted Phil standing a few feet away from the register he felt something very akin to caring.

“Hey, Dan!” Phil said, with what felt like genuine enthusiasm. Whoa, that was chipper for six in the morning. Dan smiled nervously, trying to force the color out of his cheeks.

“Hi,” he said, moving behind the counter to grab his apron. As he tied it around his waist, he felt the palpable silence between himself and Phil. Dan glanced up to see Phil watching him, his head cocked to the side in what looked like confusion. Dan bit his lip again, too hard to time, drawing blood.

“Fuck,” he exclaimed, involuntarily. Phil’s face fell with concern, and he made his way over to Dan’s side. Shit, Dan thought.

“Are you okay,” Phil asked, reaching a hand toward Dan as though he might comfort him, but letting it fall away in mid-air. Dan kept his hand glued to his face, and stared at the ground.

“Yeah, fine, just bit my lip,” Dan mumbled, turning away in embarrassment. His face was flooded with heat, not to mention the taste of blood in his mouth. 

“There’s a first aid kit,” Phil said suddenly, reaching across Dan and under the counter. As he leaned in front of him, his entire torso brushed Dan’s. Dan, panicking, took a step back. His heel made contact with something, he couldn’t see, but he was going down before he had time to think.

Dan fell with an embarrassingly loud crash into the filing cabinet behind him, and landed sprawled onto the floor behind Phil. 

“Oh my god, are you okay?” Phil asked, crouching down at Dan’s side. Was Dan okay? Clearly, there was something very wrong with him and he was suddenly very desperate to get it sorted.

“What’s your definition of okay?” Dan mumbled, squeezing his eyes shut. Phil began to laugh suddenly, a low sort of giggle. Dan opened his eyes, staring at him in what was supposed to be contempt, before he felt it bubbling up in his chest. Dan burst into laughter quite suddenly, and a moment later the two boys were both cackling like idiots. Between laughs, Phil spoke.

“It’s alright, I can trip over air or just about anything else,” he said. Dan smiled at him, feeling stupid but still distinctly less like he was on his deathbed.

“That’s impressive,” Dan said, nodding as if deeply considering what he had said. Really, he was trying to collect his racing thoughts. Phil rose to his feet, still chuckling softly. He reached out his hands, offering to help Dan up and, without thinking, Dan took them into his own and let Phil pull him to his feet. He tried to ignore the observation that Phil’s hands were of an incredible degree of softness. That wasn’t the kind of observation Dan was supposed to make.

“So other than bleeding and falling into cabinets, what are your interests,” Phil inquired suddenly, still grinning at Dan. Bleeding? Ah right, he was bleeding. Dan drew a hand to his lip. “Still want the first aid kit?” Phil offered, holding it out to Dan.

“It’s already too late,” Dan said, pushing it away. “I’ve lost too much blood, this is the end for me.” Dan stopped himself, looking away from Phil again. He wasn’t thinking, he really wasn’t. His idiotic sense of humor wasn’t lost on Louise, but this Phil guy...

“Ah, that’s too bad. And here I was growing so fond of you,” Phil said, pretending to clutch his heart in despair. Dan felt his face grow somehow even hotter. He scratched the back of his neck, and wiped the remaining blood from his lip.

“I’ll try to pull through,” Dan attempted to joke casually, ignoring the inferno that was quickly becoming his face. “For you,” he added. Oh god, wait, why had he said that? It wasn’t much worse than what Phil had said but-

“I really appreciate it,” Phil laughed, and- Dan couldn’t be certain- was he blushing? Maybe his cheeks were red from the exertion of laughing. Or maybe... Maybe he was embarrassed for Dan. Of course. That was probably it, Phil thought he was an idiot.

“Course,” Dan mumbled, feeling suddenly exhausted. He slid his phone out of his pocket to text Louise. 

“Muse,” Phil said suddenly, surprising him. “You like Muse?” Dan was taken aback for a moment. How had Phil...? Dan suddenly remembered his phone case.

“Yeah, one of my favorite bands,” he admitted, turning his phone in his hand, glancing at the case. It was actually Chris’ old phone case. He given the case to him the week before, telling him it contributed to his “emo aesthetic”. Dan had pretended to be offended, but he secretly thought the case was kind of cool.

“Mine too,” Phil said, grinning. Dan perked up, instantly. Phil liked Muse? 

“Really?” Dan asked, his voice a little too high. He started to bit down on his lip but stopped when it stung from having already been split open. He was a mess.

“Yeah,” Phil said, nodding enthusiastically. “I’ve loved them forever, I’d kill to see them in concert.”

“Hey, me too,” Dan said, letting the hand that his phone was in drop to his side.

“We should definitely save up and go together, when they’re in town,” Phil said. Dan smiled. He knew Phil was joking, or at least mostly joking, but he still felt something warm creeping up his neck.

“Definitely,” Dan said, trying to reign in his smiling so he didn’t look creepy. Suddenly, though, Dan wasn’t terrified. He wasn’t... Phil wasn’t exactly ‘scary’. Dan slipped his phone into his pocket forgetting all about texting Louise.

“So besides first aid and Muse, what are your interests?” Dan asked him, with a new-found confidence. Phil smiled, blue eyes sparkling with something vaguely familiar to Dan, but still unrecognizable. And that was probably when Phil began the ruination of Dan’s life. And that was probably when Dan let him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if I'm bad at replying to comments, I'm just bad at talking to people. let me know if you actually like the story though, so I know to continue

“I can’t do this anymore,” Dan hissed at Louise, who puffed her cheeks at him in response.

“I’m confident that you can manage,” Louise sighed. Dan was positive she was slightly annoyed with the amount of times that he had made similar statements in the past twenty minutes. In response, Dan fell silent for a moment, observing the people around them. They had (reluctantly, on Dan’s part), decided to attend an end-of-the-summer party at PJ’s house and Dan was miserable so far. The music was headache inducing, and Phil was nowhere to be seen.

Dan didn’t want this to matter to him, but it did. It had only been a week since the first shift he had worked with Phil, and in that week Dan had only lost more of his sanity. Phil was, unfortunately for Dan, incredible. The two of them got on great. Dan resented this.

“He said that he might not even come, Dan,” Louise spoke again, her tone slightly exasperated. “Parties aren’t really his thing.” Dan felt his shoulders relax, but there was something else. Disappointment? The room was entirely too loud for him to think.

“Right,” Dan said, tightening his grip on his phone. All of a sudden, Chris was at his side, holding a precariously tilted cup in one hand.

“Hey, you two,” he slurred, blatantly drunk. Louise rolled her eyes, and pulled Dan to her side.

“Hi Chris,” she said, glancing over her shoulder. “Dan and I were just going-”

“Where’s Phil an’ his boyfriend,” he interjected, his eyes now searching the room. Dan felt a pang of something in his chest. Phil and his boyfriend...? But, Louise had said...

“What? Is he bringing someone?” Louise asked, squeezing Dan’s arm as though she were holding him back. Dan was suddenly filled with an urge to pull away from her. He didn’t need to be comforted, and he definitely didn’t need to be restrained. He barely knew Phil, of course he wouldn’t know if he had a boyfriend. As if he’d ever have a chance with him, anyway. He was being ridiculous, this was ridiculous.

“S’what PJ said,” Chris shrugged. Louise ran her fingers through her hair, looking distressed.

“Where’s PJ?” she asked, as Dan pulled out of her grasp. He began to walk toward the kitchen, with the realization that he was parched.

“Dan!” Louise called to him, as he disappeared into the crowded room.

“Getting a drink,” he called back as he walked, unsure if she had heard him or not. He didn’t care. He was mad, although he wasn’t entirely certain why. He really didn’t want to know; and besides, he could hardly think with all this bloody noise.

Dan’s thoughts were jolted from his mind as he rounded the corner to the kitchen and ran directly into someone.

Something sloshed out of a cup and onto Dan’s shirt. 

“Sorry, oh my god,” the person said, as Dan glared down at his jumper. What the hell, this was his favorite shirt? He was normally passive, but this pushed his anger over the edge. Opening his mouth to yell some kind of obscenity, he raised his head.

“Let me get some paper towels,” Phil Lester said, standing inches away from him with a half empty red cup in his hand and his eyes wide with shock.

“Oh,” was all Dan could manage to say. Without warning, Phil took hold of Dan’s hand. Dan’s heart seemed to jump, settling somewhere in the back of his throat. Phil turned into the kitchen with Dan trailing behind him, dumbfounded. A mantra began in his head. Whatthefuckwhatthefuckwhathefuck-

“Here we go,” Phil spoke, as they reached the kitchen sink. He released Dan’s hand, and started to tear paper towels off of the roll. Dan just watched him, willing his brain to work. Whatthefuck.

“Told you I was clumsy,” Phil said, smiling nervously. Resting a hand on Dan’s shoulder, he began to dab at Dan’s jumper with a wadded paper towel.

“It’s alright,” Dan said, pretending not to be hyper aware of the warmth of Phil’s hands through his shirt. And it WAS alright. Dan’s anger had dissipated, replaced by a pleasant kind of numbness in his brain. What was happening?

“I think I got it,” Phil said, setting the wadded paper towels onto the counter. “That’s probably the best I can do, I’m not a dryer.” Dan laughed at this.

“A dryer? A person whose occupation is to dry things?” He asked, laughingly. Phil smiled at him, and brushed his bangs out of his eyes.

“I meant the appliance, you goob,” he said. Dan snorted.

“Goob?” he inquired, his face actually beginning to ache from smiling. Phil nodded at him, grinning. “What exactly is a goob?”

“You are,” Phil said, as he swept the paper towels he had used into the bin with one fluid motion. “And maybe me, a little bit,” he added, turning back to face Dan. Dan smiled, forgetting why he had been upset moments before.

“Goob,” Dan repeated, still chuckling. Phil watched him, his head tilted slightly as though he were considering something.

“This party,” Phil said, gazing around the room. “Are you enjoying it?” He pushed himself onto the counter in front of Dan, next to the sink. To Dan’s surprise, he patted the counter next to him. When Dan just stared at him, he raised his eyebrows and patted with more emphasis.

“Er, I guess,” Dan answered him, as he pushed himself onto the counter next to Phil. It was a tight squeeze, wedged between Phil and the fridge, and it was impossible not to be touching. His face flooded with heat. Had Phil not thought this through? Although, he seemed fine with their predicament...

What Dan had said wasn’t completely true. He hadn’t been enjoying the party until a few minutes ago. Now, he was having an excellent time.

“I hate parties.” Phil drummed his fingers against the countertop near the sink. 

“Why’d you come then?” Dan asked, before realizing how tactless he had sounded. He opened his mouth to correct himself, but Phil was already speaking.

“Came for Peej,” he shrugged, and Dan felt it against his own shoulder. “Plus, I heard you were gonna be here.” 

Dan’s breath froze in his lungs, and he shifted his gaze quickly away from Phil. Was he joking? Had Dan heard him correctly?

“Wanna come back to my house?” Dan suddenly blurted out. No! Shut up! Dan wanted to slam his head in the fridge door. Why the HELL had he just said that? Phil was staring at him, eyebrows arched in surprise. Dan thought he might vomit.

“Y’know,” Dan spoke quickly. “To play video games and stuff.” His ears burned with embarrassment. He was going to be sick, all over PJ’s kitchen floor. He was an arse, a real arse, he needed a muzzle. If Phil hadn’t thought he was creepy before...

“Sure!” Phil’s voice penetrated his thoughts. What had he just said? Dan, tentatively, looked back up at him. Had he said yes?

“Yeah?” Dan’s voice cracked. “N-now?” he stuttered, struggling to control it.

“Yeah, let’s get out of here,” Phil said, sliding off the counter and onto the floor. He turned to face Dan, waiting for him to follow.

“What about your date?” Dan suddenly remembered. Surely he wouldn’t ditch whoever he had come with, if he had come with anyone in the first place. He didn’t seem to be with anyone. Chris wasn’t always the most reliable source of information, and intoxication greatly lowered his chances.

“What date?” Phil asked, confused. Something heavy seemed to lift in Dan’s stomach, and he slid off the counter at Phil’s side.

“Right,” he said, a grin splitting his face. “Did you drive?” 

“Walked,” Phil said. So he would have to ride with Dan. Dan’s palms grew sweaty at his sides, and he scratched his jaw. Phil was going to be in his car, and then at his house, and- Oh god, was this a terrible idea?

“Well, my car’s outside,” Dan said, motioning at the back door. His car was outside, wow, where else would it be? Dan mentally slapped himself.

“Let’s get going then,” Phil gestured for Dan to lead the way. Swallowing hard, Dan started for the door. Behind him, Phil spoke again.

“Do you have Mario Kart?” he asked. The corner of Dan’s mouth twitched.

“Do you think I’m a neanderthal? Of course I have Mario Kart, you goob,” he said, as he pulled the door open. He heard Phil giggle behind him. 

Phil Lester was coming to his house. He let these words sink in. Phil Lester was coming to his house, where his parents lived. Phil Lester was coming to his house where the walls of his room were covered with the posters of bands that had seemed cool when Dan was 13 but, in this moment, seemed almost as cool as he felt. Phil Lester was coming to his house. This might have been the worst idea Dan had ever had.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is kind of angsty, but please comment if it isn't awful because I really appreciate it

As Dan pulled into his driveway, with Phil in the passenger seat of his car, he was sure he had made a mistake.

“This is it,” he said, his fingers wrapped so tightly around the steering wheel that his knuckles shone white. This was his fault, he hadn’t thought this through. It was almost 11 o’clock, and his parents weren’t expecting him home at all. He had told them he was spending the night with PJ. He wouldn’t have been allowed to go to the party, had they known there was one.

“It’s nice,” Phil said, as Dan stopped the car. Was it nice? He glanced up at his house. He supposed it was alright, but it wasn’t exactly his favorite place to be.

“Yeah,” Dan said, unsure of what else to say. The car ride to his house had been pleasant enough. Phil had talked about his favorite video games, among other things that Dan hadn’t managed to retain in his general panic.

“My Mum and Dad will probably be up,” Dan said, turning to face Phil. “Just, er, brace yourself.” Phil smiled brightly in the semi-darkness of the car, and nodded at Dan. Dan turned to open the car door.

Phil had already made his way around the car by the time Dan was stepping out. Jesus, that was fast. Dan felt winded at his sudden appearance.

“How’d you move so fast?” Dan said, closing the car door behind him.

“I’m part-ghost,” Phil replied, as the two boys started for the front door of the house.

“Are ghosts inherently fast?” Dan inquired. They had reached the front door, and Dan was struggling to find the house key in the dim porch lights. Phil watched him.

“They’re very fast,” he said, as Dan’s shaking hands fumbled with his keys. He somehow managed to find the right key, but when he tried to insert it into the lock, his hands were shaking too badly. God, he must look incompetent. 

Suddenly, Phil’s pale hands were on his own, steadying it. “I got it,” Phil said softly, taking the key from Dan’s hand. Dan, who felt as though someone had just punched him the chest, released the keys and watched as Phil turned it in the lock. The front door of the house swung open.

The two boys entered silently. Dan could hear the television, so he knew his parents were in the sitting room. Quickly, he crafted a lie.

“Daniel,” his mother’s high voice called out. “Is that you?”

“Yeah, Mum,” Dan replied, as he motioned for Phil to follow him. The two of them entered the lounge, and Dan’s parents turned to look at them.

“Who’s this?” his Mum asked, smiling at them. Dan knew the smile was fake, she hated when he brought guests home that weren’t girls. As a result, his Mum was thrilled with Louise. Each time she had visited his Mum had filled his ears with, ‘She is quite lovely, isn’t she?’ ‘When is Louise coming back?’ ‘Do you think Louise would like to stay for dinner?’ and Dan hated it. 

“This is Phil,” Dan said, nodding in Phil’s direction. “I work with him, he’s a friend of PJ’s. We’re just gonna play some video games-”

“Why’d you leave PJ’s, I thought you were spending the night?” Damn. Dan could feel Phil’s eyes on him, he thought quickly.

“Chris and PJ had a row, it got awkward so we left,” Dan said, shrugging. Phil remained silent, but he still smiled at Dan’s parents.

“Alright...” his mother said, quietly.

“Alright,” Dan repeated, and he took off toward his room with Phil in his wake. He wanted to get out of there quickly, before his Mum decided to interrogate Phil. Or before his Dad started shooting him funny looks. 

“Wait- Dan!” his mother called out, and Dan let out a sharp breath. He spun around to face her. “Is Phil spending the night?”

Wait, what? Phil... Spending the night. Dan really had not thought this through. He suddenly felt as though the air had been ripped from his lungs. He glanced up at Phil.

“If he wants to,” he said, trying to keep his voice steady. He definitely didn’t want his Mum to sense his anxiety. She always read too far into things, and he really couldn’t afford that right now. Not with Phil here.

“Sure,” Phil said, cheerfully. “If that’s alright with you, of course,” he added, turning to face the Howell’s. Dan’s mother didn’t speak for a moment.

“Of course,” she said finally, her face splitting into a smile. Dan didn’t wait for her to continue, he practically ran out of the room this time. He felt Phil following him up the stairs, as he turned into his room. As soon as Phil had entered, he closed the door behind him. 

And Phil Lester was in his room.

“Welcome,” Dan said, flopping onto his bed. He was mentally exhausted from the brief conversation with his mother, and then there was also the fact that Phil was now spending the night at his house in his bedroom with him- Dan felt like he might scream.

“I love it,” Phil said, glancing around at the embarrassing posters on his walls.

“I dunno why I put them up, they’re from my old house,” Dan mumbled. “I hadn’t redecorated since I was 13,” he added, sitting up to look at Phil. Phil smiled at him (did he ever stop smiling), and Dan watched as his eyes fell upon the piano.

“You play?” Phil asked, settling onto the piano bench. His fingers hovered above the keys, as though he were about to.

“Uh, poorly,” Dan replied, watching Phil. “Do you?” he asked.

“No,” Phil laughed suddenly. “Definitely not. I’d like to though,” he said, brushing his fingers lightly across the keys, soundlessly. Dan felt a rush of something warm flood his chest, and he smiled at Phil, who was staring down at his own hands on the piano.

“I could teach you,” Dan said, feeling as though his words were spilling from the warm spot in his chest. “Some time. If you wanted,” he shrugged, as Phil turned to look at him.

“Yeah, that’d be great,” Phil said, to Dan’s surprise. “But first, Mario Kart.” He rose from the bench and smiled at Dan, his tongue poking out from between his teeth, and Dan felt as though his chest might actually be melting.

“Shit,” Dan swore, as he glanced at his TV in the corner of the room. “I left Mario Kart in the lounge.” He didn’t want to have to speak with his parents again, but Phil wanted to play... He resolved to go get it.

“Let’s go then.” Phil smiled, pushing his bangs out of his eyes. Dan rose to his feet, and the two of them exited his room and started down the hallway. As they made their way down the stairs, Dan opened his mouth to speak. Suddenly, he could hear his parents hushed voices in the lounge. He held out a hand to stop Phil, as he listened quietly.

“...I worry about it,” his mother was saying. “I thought he might be with that nice Pentland girl.”

“Maybe he is, maybe he isn’t. You shouldn’t worry,” his father spoke. “It’s not like we can do anything about it.”

“I feel like I’m not doing enough,” she replied, sighing. “If we stamp it out now, it might not be a problem later.” Dan felt frozen in place, what were they talking about? He had almost forgotten about Phil at his side.

“So what if the kid’s gay,” his Dad spoke suddenly, and Dan’s hand shot up to his mouth. Shit, he didn’t want Phil to hear this. He started to turn around.

“I will not have a gay son!” his mother hissed, and Dan felt himself freeze again. What? What had she just said? He had never heard her speak those words aloud. “It’s disgusting, do you think I’m going to allow that under my roof? That I’m going to allow him?” His father was silent, but Dan didn’t want to wait around for his response. He practically bolted up the stairs, barely registering that Phil was following. He tore into his room, and slumped down onto the piano bench. Then, to Dan’s alarm, he began to cry.

He heard Phil enter his room, and gently shut the door behind him. Eyes blurred with tears that he was praying Phil wouldn’t notice, he looked up at him. Phil turned to face Dan, and his face immediately fell. Lightning fast, Phil was at his side, his arms wrapped around Dan, engulfing him in his warmth; and for some reason Dan melted into his embrace like he had done it before. Like it was normal.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Phil said, and Dan felt like it must be. It must be okay, if this was what okay felt like. He was still crying, but it hardly matter because it was okay. He was okay, as long as no one moved. As long as the warmth didn’t leave. He was okay.

Phil didn’t pull away. Instead, he settled onto the bench next to Dan, who buried his face in Phil’s shoulder. He was forgetting to care, forgetting that this was Phil Lester, and that that was scary. He was forgetting a great deal of things.

“Y-you’re gay?” Phil said quietly, and Dan was surprised by how flustered he sounded. Phil usually sounded so composed, Dan was the flustered one. He was also surprised that Louise hadn’t already told him, but then, why would she? He pulled away from Phil to look at him.

“God, I’m sorry,” Phil said, shaking his head and turning away from Dan. “That was- I’m rubbish at comforting people.” Facing away from Dan, he let out a short breath. Dan, surprising himself, reached a hand out and let it rest on Phil’s shoulder.

“No, you’re not,” he practically whispered, and Phil turned back to face him at his touch. “And yeah, I’m gay.” He let out a breathless laugh, his eyes dropping to the floor. This wasn’t how he had expected this night to go. He had anticipated disaster, but not to this degree. 

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Phil asked, his arm wrapping itself around Dan’s waist. The familiar blush was creeping back into Dan’s face. Aggressively, he wiped the tears from his face with his shirt sleeve.

“What’s there to talk about?” Dan shrugged, smiling sadly at Phil. “This was all staged, I’m an actor.” He was rambling, which he always did when he was emotional. Luckily, Phil smiled at him. 

“This was a lot of trouble to go through to get my attention, Howell,” he said. Dan laughed raspily.

“Yeah, well you fell for it,” he countered, still laughing softly. As he met Phil’s eyes, he realized his face was only inches away. His laugh seemed to catch in his throat. Was he breathing?

“Didn’t I?” Phil said, and he was- What was he doing? Was he closing the gap between them? Panicking, Dan rose to his feet. Phil, looking startled, stared up at him.

“I’ve got some old Zelda games we could play,” Dan spoke quickly. “Or Sonic or whatever, you can look through them,” he gestured at the games scattered around his TV and on his bookshelf. Phil opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again. He stared at Dan for another moment, and Dan noted the color in his cheeks. 

“Anything’s good,” Phil said, smiling weakly. He stood up, and made his way over to the corner where Dan’s games were. With his back to Dan, he began examine the games. “Crash Bandicoot,” he chuckled lightly, inspecting the case of a particular one.

Dan took this moment to compose himself. Everything was moving too quickly, he felt the room spinning around him. He gripped the edge of the piano. Phil Lester, THE Phil Lester, had one hundred percent, indefinitely, without question tried to kiss him. And Dan, the idiot, hadn’t let him.

This wasn’t at all how Dan had thought this night was going to go, and it had barely begun. He had from now until morning to fuck up again, and he was definitely capable.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been months since I updated but imma keep writing this, if anyone actually likes it

Dan was losing at Mario Kart.

Phil wasn’t necessarily better than him; when he factored in his looming existential dread and crippling embarrassment, he was doing pretty well.

Phil tried to kiss me. Dan thought, swerving Yoshi’s cart off a ledge and into the water below. Phil chuckled beside him. Dan wanted to die. Phil tried to kiss me when I was crying. Who does that? Dan wondered, as Yoshi was hauled off the ledge and back onto the road.

Phil tried to kiss me while I was crying because my parents- No, Dan didn’t want to think about that. He wanted to slam his head repeatedly against the wall, and he wanted to... Dan chanced a look at Phil. He wasn’t looking at Dan, his face was glued to the screen, tongue poking out from between his teeth in concentration.

Dan realized suddenly that they hadn’t spoken. He couldn’t remember the last thing they had said to each other. Had Phil noticed? Of course he had noticed the absence of Dan’s incessant babbling. He was probably horrified, and was thinking of excuses to leave. 

“I am zoning out,” Dan said, a little too quickly. “I think it’s true that video games rot your brain.” He paused the race, and turned to look at Phil. 

“You’re just saying that because you're losing,” Phil unpaused. Surprised, Dan scrambled to get a hold of his controller. He was in last place now. He glared at Phil, feeling a sudden rush of anger.

“You’re just gonna let my brain rot?” Dan asked, noticing the unmistakable edge to his voice. He paused the game. Phil was giggling, and suddenly the sound was irritating to Dan. 

Dan rose to his feet.

“Do you want to sleep in the guest room?” he asked, monotonously. Phil stared at him, seemingly startled by this fast turn of events.

“Now?” he asked, blinking rapidly. Dan shrugged.

Phil stared at him for a long moment, before setting his controller on the floor and rising to his feet.

“Lead the way,” Phil said, his voice strangely soft. Dan ignored this, and started for the hallway. The guest bedroom was the one adjacent to his, and smelled like his grandmother. He led Phil into the room, and watched as Phil appraised it.

“You want pajamas?” Dan asked, too overwhelmed to pinpoint his anger. Phil seemed to consider this for a moment before shaking his head.

“No, I usually sleep in my pants,” he chuckled, and Dan shrugged again. He turned to leave the room, wanting desperately to be on his own. 

“Wait!” Phil called out suddenly, and Dan turned to face him. Phil was silent for a moment, his face contorted in concern. “Are you alright?” he asked, quietly. Dan didn’t speak for a moment, considering his answer.

“Fine,” he said eventually. “Just tired. Brain rotting, and all that,” he mumbled. Phil nodded, looking disbelieving but Dan was already on his way out. Just as he was about to shut the door on Phil, Phil called out.

“Goodnight, Dan!” 

Dan let the door fall closed behind him, pretending as though he hadn’t heard Phil.

He entered his own room, immediately flipping off the light and collapsing into his bed. The springs creaked under his weight. Dan took a moment to slide out of his jeans and settle into the mattress before he allowed himself to think.

He was angry. Angry because.... It hit him suddenly. He was angry because Phil didn’t like him. He barely knew Dan; why had he tried to kiss him? To shut him up? Dan didn’t know, but he felt used. Phil probably had come to the party with a boy. He didn’t really like Dan, he just wanted...

Dan got the impression that he was being irrational. But, Phil had seemed so unaffected by their almost-kiss. Dan didn’t like being used, and Phil had probably expected a lot more out of this night. Dan wanted to hit something. How could be so daft to think that Phil Lester could ever be interested in him?

It wasn’t Phil’s fault that Dan was an idiot. Dan felt guilty for banishing him to the guest room, but it’s not like they could have shared his bed. Dan felt a rush of longing at this thought, but stamped it out quickly. I don’t like Phil Lester. Dan decided, glancing at his phone on the nightstand. The screen had just lit up revealing 37 texts from Louise.

He would deal with it in the morning. In the morning, Dan would not be interested in Phil Lester. He smiled to himself. In the morning I won’t like Phil, in the morning I won’t like Phil, in the morning-

Dan suddenly felt the warmth of Phil’s arm around his waist, his breath so close to Dan’s mouth-

He was doomed.

 

***  
Dan awoke the next morning feeling strangely light headed. He tried to remember what he had had to drink last night, when everything came rushing back to him. Phil was in the room next to him, and Dan was a massive prick.

Dan scrambled for his phone, scrolling quickly through the texts from Louise.

where r u?

chris says u left

chris says you left with PHIL??

text me now daniel james howell

ARE YOU CURRENTLY WITH PHIL LESTER

y do u have a phone if u dont use it

TEXT ME NOW

The rest were similar. Dan’s fingers flew across the keypad, desperate for Louise’s sage advice.

From Dan: Lou, are you up?

He glanced at the clock. It was noon.

From Louise: yes im up dan its past noon. what happened 2 u??

From Dan: A lot. Hang on.

Dan slid off the bed, forgetting he was in his pants, and made his way toward the guest room. His phone buzzed in his hand.

From Louise: dont u “hang on” me. im worried!! r u ok??

Dan ignored the text, quietly opening the guest room door a crack. His face flooded with color. Phil lay strewn across the bed, his chest bare, clearly still asleep. Dan closed the door quickly but carefully, and darted back to his room.

From Dan: Phil is in my bed.

From Louise: in ur BED??!?!

From Dan: Well, no not exactly. He’s in the guest room. Help.

From Louise: what happened

From Dan: I invited him over

From Louise: ??!

From Dan: And then my mom invited him to spend the night, and we overheard them talking about how they’re worried im gay and I started crying and phil tried to kiss me but he doesnt even like me Lou and Im mad at him and i was prick to him last night and idk what to do

From Louise: hang on, he tried to kiss u?

From Dan: Did you read the rest of it? He doesn’t like me Lou. I think he wanted... sex or something.

From Louise: dan, where did u even get that from?

From Dan: why did he try to kiss me when he barely knows me?

From Louise: Didn’t you want to kiss him?

From Dan: Not at the moment.

From Dan: Actually

From Dan: I mean yeah I did but

From Louise: phil wouldn’t do something unless he meant it, i promise

From Dan: ...

From Dan: Why am I so daft?

From Louise: idk. how much of a prick were u?

From Dan: I sent him to the guest room. I was short with him.

From Louise: he’ll forgive you

From Dan: Ok should i wake him up?

From Louise: make him breakfast, he loves pancakes

From Dan: I love you Lou

From Louise: i know

Dan set phone onto his dresser, and smiled at the floor. 

Maybe Lou was right.


End file.
